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“This relationship is a mess, and I want you to change.” Now look in the mirror and repeat the above statement. Ouch! No matter how much we wish we had control over her behaviors, actions, and feelings, we don’t. We can not change him. It’s really annoying, isn’t it? Because if s/he would just do […]

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CalMatters is a Sacramento-based nonpartisan, nonprofit journalism venture committed to explaining how California's state Capitol works and why it matters. It works with more than 130 media partners throughout the state that have long, deep relationships with their local audiences, including Embarcadero Media.

About this blog: I am a LMFT specializing in couples counseling and grief and have lived in Silicon Valley since 1969. I'm the president of Connect2 Marriage Counseling. I worked in high-tech at Apple,...